Soul Midwifery

My present role

I am currently able to offer the following support:

  • tailored support for people walking towards death, including being with any aspect of the journey that is proving challenging – learn more at www.careofthesoul.co.nz
  • gentle guidance and support with practicalities for the person who is dying, and for those surrounding them in their process
  • mentoring those who are learning the role of soul midwife or death doula
  • working with groups about what it means to accompany people who are dying – Being with Dying series based on my book, Soul Midwife’s Journal – stories of honouring death.

My Understanding of Soul Midwifery

Birth and death may seem like opposites, but in truth they are very similar occasions, points on a continuum, an in-coming and an out-going, or phases in an eternal cycle of newness and decay.

As we live our human lives we are always being born and dying. When the soul, the divine spark, takes physical form it slowly forgets and dies to its own essential lightness and beauty, in order to live in the material world. In parallel it births the ego-self, the human tool for living in matter. At best the journey of later life is one of then dying to the ego-self and birthing the real, eternal self. If this has not happened along the way of life, with the beckoning of death through age or illness there comes an opportunity for this dying of ego and birthing of the consciousness that is the true self.

Not everyone experiences death in this way, it is true. Modern life is not always conducive to the unfolding of natural processes, and so the old art of Soul Midwifery is being revived, to facilitate the smooth passage of dying.

The role of the Soul Midwife is to assist the dying person to birth this connection with his deepest self, both before and after death. She is present to all the emotions that may arise in the face of death; the fear, anger, disappointment and regret, as well as the relief and joy. She encourages the resolution of the individual’s unfinished business. She creates and holds a sacred space in which the dying person may make his journey. If, following his leave-taking, he gets confused or held back, she will gently encourage him to move towards the light of his essential being and be born into the vast expansiveness we call death.

As Soul Midwives our most essential and ongoing task is to midwife our own soul, to travel our own dark and painful inner-land in order to expose ever more fully our own joyful and fearless self. Our presence, then, is our most vital tool.

As we accompany the dying, being with whatever arises, blessed by the intimacy and rich learning of our journeying together, we come to know the deep privilege of this work.